Stages of Life

Well.. when you are in kindergarden, you or perhaps, not so much yourself, but your parent had have a plan which primary school you're going. Then, when you're in primary school, it will then have to depends on you academic result in order for you to go to the well-known high school in the local area. At least, this is what happened in my community. Then, high school, 3rd grade of high school, you have to make a choice between to further you study in Science stream or Commerce, in some instance, Art, which was never a choice in my school. In some school, in order for one to do science stream, their academic result have to be at the very least, up to a certain standard. well, not applied to my school either, where everyone one get to go to science stream in the 4th grade regardless of how shitty their academic results are. Thank this one and only one system that I conform to in JS High, i ended up in some Science stream classes. Not exactly, I was in Technology.. but that's not the point, as long as I am still taking all the science subjects. At 5th grade, we worry about where to go next step. College ? Go abroad? or stay back and go to the Local uni? We are always given a choice to choose from throughout our life. Until this step. Graduated from uni. The choice is not at ours anymore. Things are so often, beyond our control and we ended up depends so much on Luck.

Anyway, these was never me. I always know where to go next step. After kindergarden would be JS Prim, coz sista goes to this one. After JS Prim, would be JS High, coz thats the one and only one somewhat good school in my local area. Then would be college follow by any of the uni in Aus. This is just my ordinary life compare to others who has the opportunity to fly from one country to another at the parent's expense. well, thats good enough for me. I was never be so uncertain of what to do next step, not until this moment. I am lost. I lose my focus. I started wonder what had I done so far. Not much, seriously. Maybe thats the side effects of having everything well-planned by someone all the time while I had been alive. Out of a sudden, I dont know what and how should I proceed without such a planner.

I thought I want to make my life different. So, I tried to be daring, perhaps, just look or trying-hard to behave as if I was. I never regret of whatever move and changes that I made. It's just that after the freshness had long gone, and in my eye, everything seems to be back to what it was like as before. And, here I am, Bored.

Growing up...
When we were a kid, everythings seems to go so easy. We seems to be able to learn and pick up new stuff so quickly. We seems to be able to get to know people / friends, without having to taking so much uneccessary rubbish into consideration, so easily. We seems to be able to get things that we want so easily by, perhaps, just ask for it. We have so little things to worry about. Things just seems so much more easier back in those days. How I wish i could stay as a kid forever. Growing up is no fun!